missunknown

Dear Miss unknown, 

Please consider yourself slapped round the head for being so hard on yourself, for being negative and for letting the apathy sink in. 
How many times have you said that what you’re doing is not a “diet”, it’s a lifestyle change, it’s a long-term journey? Well journeys have twists and turns, pit stops, break downs, diversions and all manner of problems, but at the end of the day they are still part of the journey and they still get you to the place you need to be going. You have to embrace them as part of the experience and learn from them. 
Remember that everyone’s journey is different, you’re travelling from different starting points to different destinations in different vehicles, on different roads and in different driving conditions so it’s useless to compare your journey to someone else’s. Concentrate on your journey, on your progress, on getting to where you want to be whilst not forgetting where you’ve come from and how far you’ve come. 
I know it’s hard watching your friend consistently lose weight on a different diet and losing considerable more every work than you and doesn’t seem to be struggling one bit with it but remember the diet that she is doing doesn’t train her to eat proper foods, yes she is losing it but is she gonna keep it off in the long run? Maybe she is struggling who are you to know but probably doesn’t like showing her weakness. I know it doesn’t seem that she is considering she is losing 7+ pounds a week. 

More importantly, remember that you have already lost 1 stone since you started dieting, you’re slimmer than you used to be, and you have already lost a dress size, remember how you hated wearing those size 28 trousers and now suddenly you can pull them down without loosening a button, you know that its working, fair enough you would like to be a lot fitter but in time you will, at least you are heading in a healthier direction better than the way you were heading. Isn’t this what your goal started out with? 

Darling, you have done so well, don’t let yourself be undermined by someone else’s success because you are successful too; you have lost weight, you are losing weight and you will continue to lose weight. God willing. 

I know that “dieting” and exercise are difficult for you, as much as you want to want to do these things they are contrary to the habits that have been instilled in you since you were a child. Here there’s only one thing to do and that is to break the old habit and create a new healthier one. You can do it. I know you will start to enjoy exercise and you are beginning to enjoy healthy food, you enjoy having a healthy attitude towards food even though it is a huge effort. Persistence and dedication are the key here “Miss unknown” and again, only you can change this. You just need to work on it. 

I strongly advise you doing what you is best for you and not what your friend tells you to do, this is your lifestyle change not her’s. I know she is looking out for you but you want this lifestyle change to last and not just for a few months. Your heart is telling you that you can do it the proper way and not by starving yourself. Trust in you. 
This time you just need to be more proactive in ensuring you commit to the exercises and that you see the programme through. Do it. Commit to it. 

You’ve let the focus shift from health back to weight alone and that’s not good for you. I think you’re right in deciding not to weigh in every day you know that once a week is enough and remember the surprise on your face when it’s a good result, you know that there is going to come a time when you plateau but this is all the aspects of dieting, its never rosy all the time. 

I think it will do you good to let yourself just enjoy eating healthy, low fat food and to enjoy exercising without worrying whether you’ve lost or gained a pound. I know your worried that if you haven’t lost weight then your husband may go off with someone else who is more prettier and thinner than you or worse still that your biological clock is ticking and your desires to have a baby may be lost, there is so much riding on the idea that you lose weight and with a lot of willpower and support from everyone you will get through this. 

As for your rut, the only person who can get you out of it is you. So stop whining about it and start doing something. Be proactive. Yes, you’re in less than your ideal situation, but if you react positively you can make changes for the better. Remember that you are responsible for how you react to a situation, so take control and do what you have to do. 

Most of all, my dear, remember that all these changes in your life have been chosen by you. No one is making you do this - you’ve chosen to do it. You’re working hard to create a better life for yourself and I’m so proud that you’ve made the right decision. 

Remember why you choose your username? It’s because that you believe that you are a fragile lonely person that hides behind a mask and that you don’t want anyone to know your true pain and suffering of every day of what you are going through, you don’t want anyone to judge you on your faults as you were judged since you were a child. You think after losing weight you will have some respect from people at last and believe that you are “NOT” a failure anymore and you can do this, I know you can. Believe in yourself, cause I do.

With all my tough love and the entirety of my support, 

~Your alter ego~